First Impressions

"I'll have a steak with a side of ROFLs

So here's a cheeky wee hybrid of a blog.

I've just finished watching the last in the current series of BBC2s The Trip starring Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon, directed by Michael Winterbottom, and felt compelled to speak about it.

Now I know this defies the rules of a film blog (in that it's not a film that I am discussing - Quelle horreur!) HOWEVER the key element of the show I will be discussing in brief-bloggy-style is the frequent and impressive impressions Coogan and Brydon do from various films...see what I did there?

How gallus I am!

I remain conflicted about the six-part series; some episodes had me in stitches, some had me reaching for the razor blades. Therefore I can't confirm the category I'd file The Trip under (FAIL or SCORE) but one thing I can say is that the impressions they hit out with at the dinner table are phenomenal.

You know, the kind you find yourself trying to do because they make it look so easy (we've all attempted the Michael Caine "only supposed to blow the bloody DOORS OFF!" and anyone that denies it better get dialing 999, coz their pants are on FIRE!)

I found myself completely forgiving the latter parts of the episodes for being so sodden with pathos that I wanted to just turn over or end it (my life i mean), purely because I was still experiencing the after-tremours of a really good LOL!

So my advice to anyone that wants a right gid laugh, watch the repeats on BBC Iplayer, or youtube,and stop each episode about 20 mins in, that way its all hilarious-killer, no depressing-filler!

Or better still watch the clips i've put below, don't say i'm not good to you.

In no particular order, please find below a list of the best impressions that tickled me:

1. Michael Caine - episode 1 saw Coogan and Brydon doing a "Caine-Off". Brilliance.

2. Various James Bonds - Roger Moore, Pierce Brosnan, villains. "Come, come Mr Bond."

3. Ray Winstone - "drink it". ROFL.

4. Woody Allen - "my mother and law wants to dance on my grave, i'll get buried at sea"

5. Richard Gere - *distant look* *laugh* Respond.

6. Random costume drama soldier - "Gentlemen to bed!"

The best way of spreading Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear!

What's your favourite colour?

Ohhhhhhhhhhh the weather outside may be frightful but festive films are SO delightful!!!

Now that we are officially in the "acceptable" bracket for watching Christmas films (also known as December) I feel inclined to address the topic of warm and fuzzy festive viewing.

As the snow continues to blanket our lives and emotions at this time of year [I am in a glass case of emotion!!!] there ain't nowt better for lifting the spirits than a good old Christmas film. No cold turkeys here, read on for the creme de la creme of christmassy goodness. Mmmmmmmmmm cosy!

Santa's "dressed down" demeanour failed to impress

"I'm such a cotton-headed-ninny-muggins" and "SANTA?!?!?!I KNOW HIM!" are just a couple of the many catchphrases to come from Will Ferrell's comic festive offering Elf. The plot follows the escapades of Buddy as he leaves the North Pole and ventures to NYC in search of his real father, the surly James Caan. Ludicrous, light and utterly watchable if this film were a festive beverage it'd be a triple shot gingerbread latte with extra syrup and LOLs.

Anyone who's read my "Who's the Daddy?" blog will already be aware of my adoration for Jimmy Stewart as George Bailey in It's Wonderful Life.

Frank Capra's 1946 classic is mandatory Christmas viewing in this house or you're out of the Wallace clan - a rule that I think should be adopted by most families. Granted, you spend roughly 85%of the film wondering why life is so wonderful but by GOD does that other 15% make up for it!

For those who haven't seen it I recommend the original black and white version as technicolour is just bizarre. With annual screenings on at the GFT throughout December, I highly recommend making a day of it: take in some mulled wine, laugh at the numpties falling on George Square's ice rink and go snuggle up like they did in the olden days. Vintage.

The only way to travel

I would've liked to have been present at the pitch for Raymond Briggs' animated classic The Snowman:

"Right lads, we've got a wee boy that makes a cross-dressing snowman, who's partial to a spot of breaking and entering, and abucts the boy taking him to a raucous party with his much older, multi-cultural snowman mates indulging in drinking and dancing and then disappears in the morning leaving the child feeling confused, slightly used and a bit mental.

Oh, and we'll get Bowie to present it from his attic."

Brilliant.

I jest of course, this magical 26-minute animation tugs the heart-strings of everyone that remembers the sheer joy and excitement of the first snowfall of winter, before you had responsibilities; childhood naivety at it's best.

He's obviously just spent crimbo at the Wallace's

For all the cynics out there sick of the shmaltz and sweetness I suggest Bill Murray's 1988 alternate take on Ebeneezer in Scrooged.

This tale of a selfish and skeptical tv exec haunted by 3 ghosts of past. present and future is an updated take on Dickens' A Christmas Carol.

A witty and smirksome re-imagining of a classic, Murray is at his finest as the aptly named Frank Cross. Given the choice between him and Michael Caine in my other favourite adaptation of this timeless tale, The Muppet Christmas Carol, I'd be hard-pushed to come to a final decision.

On one hand you've got Murray's drole humour and dry wit and on the other hand you've got Caine and MUPPETS!!!!

spot the odd one out

So instead, here's a snippet from both, and I'll let you decide:





Other Recommended Festive Stocking Fillers:

1. Home Alone 1 & 2 (1990/1992)
2. White Christmas (1954)
3. Bad Santa (2003)
4. Jingle All The Way (1996)
5. Miracle on 34th Street (1947 - not the one with Wilma Rubble and irritating-child-with-lisp)