You Gats-ta-be kidding me!

Potentially a technicolour nightmare

Something is rotten in the state of Hollywood - 3D film.

Thus far I've found the use of 3D predominantly over-rated and unnecessary: Avatar, Toy Story 3 - mehhhh. Underwhelmed pretty much covers it.

So you can only imagine my utter disgust upon hearing that Baz Luhrmann plans to film his adaptation of F. Scott Fitzgerald's The Great Gatsby in 3D.

Well, hell hath no fury like a Carlin scorned: "3D?!?" I shrieked, like a tormented soul, descending into the fiery pits of hell.

Being of rational mind (for the most part) I attempted to consider Luhrmann's possible motivation behind this frankly bizarre decision. Perhaps this will allow for increasing audience involvement: to absorb the electric atmosphere of Gatsby's grand soirees, to choke on the moral and social decay of the valley of ashes and drown in those elusive distant green lights at the end of the dock - actually, I'm talking myself into it now.

OR is it pure gimmick; less about intoxicating imagery, more about nauseating sums of cash?

Don't get me wrong, I'm a fan of some of Luhrmann's work. His 1996 modern suburban take on Romeo & Juliet brought Shakespeare to generations of people who would've otherwise remained wholly ignorant of his work. High five Baz. And that sunscreen tune was brilliant:




However, since his WOEFUL 2008 homage to his homeland, Australia, I've lost all faith. Particularly upon learning that Luhrmann intends to shoot arguably the greatest American novel of the twentieth century, a text so quintessentially American it reeks of apple pie and revolves around the key theme of the "loss of the American dream" - in SYDNEY !

I may as well give up hope now and file it under "FAIL" along with the other attempts to interpret this classic into a silverscreen masterpiece.

And these aren't the only points of contention I wish to flag up.

Casting is also giving me cause for concern. As I've discussed with friends and tutors alike, Carey Mulligan as Daisy Buchanan I can just about see but Leonardo DiCaprio as Jay Gatsby?
A huge fan of DiCaprio's work, but he ain't no Robert Redford:

smouldering so intense he's been held partially accountable for global warming

"In the words of MTV cribs - this is where the 'magic' happens."

Although, clearly it takes more than dashing to bring this classic to life, as was the case for Jack Clayton's atmospheric but lacklustre 1974 adaptation.

And Tobey Maguire as narrator and protagonist, Nick Carraway? Hmmmmmmmm, the jury's out on that one.

Suggestions welcome, I'm composing a letter to Luhrmann as you read...

2011: A Promising Film Odyssey

Specsavers 2011 Spring/Summer Collection

"I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked..." They just don't write 'em like that anymore, but apparently they can adapt 'em into partially animated feature length films.

Rob Epstein and Jeffry Friedman's potrayal of the 1957 obscenity trial held over Allen Ginsberg's celebrated poem, "Howl", presents the audience with a combination of archive footage, animated illustrations of the poem and some reportedly sterling acting from James Franco.

Not released in the UK until February 2011 this is just one of many literary masterpieces that I am simultaneously anxious and terrified of seeing translated to film.



Ok, maybe "terrified" is a tad strong, but if you haven't already gathered from my slaughtering of Scorsese's "Shutter Island" I really HATE it when an adaptation goes wrong. You know that feeling of intense disappointment like when you realise a celebrity is actually a total prat in real life and it totally taints everything else they ever do (yeah Christian Bale I'm talkin to you): you just want to ask why, jump through a portal in time back to a better, simpler place where ignorance reigned and everything was rosy. This is how I feel when I see an excellent book poorly adapted to film, so needless to say my anxiety levels are gradually rising with the impending release of various literary classics on the silver screen.

Next case in point, arguably the best novel of American 20th Century literature, F. Scott Fitzgerald's The Great Gatsby.

Ahh, the X Factor has just started.

Now, when you entitle something as "arguably the best of a century" the bar has already been set inconceivably high, so it's little wonder that many (4 in total) have attempted to bring this lavish and tragic tale of wealth and desire to the silver screen in the past. Most notably, Jack Clayton's 1974 offering wound up being somewhat of a flop, atmospheric as it is. Even the radioactive Robert Redford and Mia Farrow couldn't bring this back from the brink of mundane.

Seems bizarre that a text so rich in imagery, full of characters absolutely dripping in pathos, in an era of extreme decadence could be anything other than a visual feast.

I refuse to be disheartened though, and I'll stand resilient in the hope that the upcoming film adaptation of the novel will do it some justice. With Leonardo DiCaprio as Gatsby and Carey Mulligan as Daisy Buchanan, SURELY I won't be let down - famous last words...

"Dear diary, today I met a boy..."

Hunter S. Thompson's novel The Rum Diary follows the soul-searching adventure of journalist Paul Kemp, writing, drinking and fighting his way around the Carribean. Brilliant. So when I heard this was being made into a film starring Johnny Depp (of course) I was delighted. That was about 3 years ago, so the fact they're finally in the post-production stages feels like like a long overdue treat. My only concern is that the hype has been building (in my head anyway) for so long now that it won't live up to expectations, but with Depp's dedication to Thompson's work and if "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" is anything to go by, I shouldn't be let down. Roll on 2011...

My face is the same when I forget my travel scrabble

I must admit I don't have my hopes set high for this one, as I simply don't know how the spontaneous narrative structure of the novel will translate to film. I don't know if I want it to in fact. I am referring to the screen version of Jack Kerouac's defining novel On The Road. The largely biographical journey of Sal Paradise is now considered a crucial text of the Beat Generation, influencing generations of road-trippers on spiritual booze-fuelled journeys for years to come.

With Walter Salles (of "The Motorcycle Diaries" fame) at the directorial helm, Francis Ford Coppolla controlling production and a young and promising cast including Brit talent Sam Riley as Sal Paradise: in theory it should work.

I remain unconvinced.

Bob Dylan once said of the novel: "It changed my life like it changed everyone else's." Wonder what he'll make of the film...

(On The Road is due for release in 2011)



Novels that translated well to film:

• LA Confidential by James Ellroy
• American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis
• The Godfather by Mario Puzo

Lost in Translation:

• The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold (awright Peter you like CGI, we get it! not always appropriate though eh?)
• Frankenstein by Mary Shelley (time and time again they've been more horrific than any monster)
• The Human Stain by Philip Roth (Anthony Hopkins as a black American...nuff said)

The last film to REALLY grind my gears...

I\'d look ashamed too Martin - Ben's jacket is by far the most impressive thing to come out of this production..

...was Scorsese's ravaging of Dennis Lehane's pyschological thriller "Shutter Island".

From clumsy start to lacklustre finish I was utterly disappointed with everything from the cast and setting to the poor acting in this ham-fisted re-hashing of an excellent book. In less than 2 hours I lost faith in Scorsese, DiCaprio and mankind (too much?)

I read the book in one sitting, and this is not because I have little else to do with my time, quite the contrary in fact, but this is a skillfully crafted thriller brimming with excitement, doubt, terror and fear. The characters and setting are vividly brought to life from page one. Lehane's writing style is akin to that of Cormac McCarthy: cinematic, stark and instantly recognisable as a book that would transfer to film in one slick transaction.

But no.

Instead of sticking to Lehane's captivating and instantly enthralling opening scene, Scorsese instead opts for a bumbling and unconvincing boat-ride, omitting any sensitivity and key insight into DiCaprio's character "Teddy" and, infact, failing to even mention the significance of being out at the sea, and water - an intrisic piece of imagery that is recalled time and time again throughout the story.

Mark Ruffalo completely misses his side-kick role of "Chuck" entirely, appearing as less of the suspicious friend as intended, and more of an unconvincing oaf in an over-sized suit.

Ben Kingsley was well cast as the mysterious and cold Dr. Lawley, but even he left me feeling like something was array. The chief inspector and many of the inmates shrank in comparison to their spine-chilling descriptions in the book and were, quite frankly, laughable.



Leo's just realised what he's done in making this my reaction at the end credits...

Leonardo DiCaprio was, without doubt, the saving grace of this meagre offering but even he couldn't bring it anywhere near up to the standard of the book. His scenes with Michelle Williams were relatively emotive and believable, but nonetheless, disappointing.

Such a rich and captivating book would be a gift for any director, and when I saw Scorsese's name roll up at the end credits I just about cried. All emotion, style, sensitivity and...what's that other thing...oh yeah... NARRATIVE, were void in this adaptation.

Verdict: EPIC FAIL.